Driving Laws

Okay, first thing I do not have my drivers license.  But having grown up with a controlling and emotionally abusive mother I could not get one when everyone else did. Now I have to find someone to teach me how to drive. After I renew my “L” (Learners) license. I like the basic structure of the BC driving laws, in fact I think that a less regulated system is just asking for trouble. Because it doesn’t make sure the ‘kids’ can drive before allowing them to do so.

Currently in British Columbia Canada a person needs to pass a written test to receive their ‘L’. If they pass they are given a temporary license, a new driving manual to read and a magnetic red square with an L in the middle to affix to their vehicle. (it must be on when ever some one with an L class license is driving). They are not allowed to drive by themselves and can only have one extra passenger and the responsible adult. The responsible adult with must be over 25 and have their full drivers license. The responsible adult must be in a state capable of driving and sitting in the passenger seat (no drugs alcohol etc in his/her system). They have two years before the license expires and can take the road test to qualify for the “N” (New) license. There are also restrictions on when they can drive and they cannot have alcohol in their blood. And if you are under 19 you must have your parent/guardian sign that you have their permission to take the test.

With the N a person can drive on their own with one none family member passenger. This restriction does not apply to immediate family members. They can have more passengers if there is a responsible adult with them (again in the pass anger seat). After two years you can take the road test and qualify for your full class 5 drivers license.

Here is my problem with the law. It makes it almost impossible for people to learn how to drive without breaking the law.  Okay maybe those with parents who are willing to teach them won’t have this problem. But I don’t know one person over 25 who is willing to teach me how to drive. I could take driving lessons but those won’t help much if I cannot practice, and they are bloody expensive. At least $500 for the full course. So one pay check.  My holiday pay check, a years worth of savings, etc. It’s a lot of money. I feel like if the government wants people to learn to drive properly and have these laws they should have government sponsored driving schools with a sliding pay scale. But it’s not something I ever expect to happen. My brain laughs at me for thinking it.

Then there’s the parent permission obstacle. I’m sorry but I’m not a fan of parental permission. I understand the need for it. But I don’t like it. I know too many kids/young adults (the label depends on the individual) who do not live with their parents. For acquiring your L license I would remove the parental permission requirement and just require it for the N. Simply because you need to have a person over 25 with you to drive. Most people under 25 don’t know too many people over 25 who would be able/willing to teach them. Especially if their parent’s weren’t. But this allows them the chance if their parents are control freaks or if their parents aren’t around. And it speeds up the literal time they can achieve their full license by three years (assuming they don’t get their L until they are 19). See the average person can get their full license as early as 19, if the individual doesn’t get parental permission they cannot get it until they are at least 22.  This is very harmful for the person because the lack of a drivers license severely limits one’s ability to get a job. I know I’ve been stuck at the same joint for almost 4 years because I don’t have wheels and live just outside of town (20 min walk to the nearest bus stop y’all).

I do not think it is a good idea to hand out full licenses after a written test or a three month road permit that I’ve heard is all some states require. I do think that driving is both a right (only because of how vital it is to getting a job) and a privilege. You should have to prove that you can drive. But getting the knowledge should be easier then it is in the current system in BC (for people like me). And once you have your license I think every 10 years you should have to retake the driving test. And when ever you renew your drivers license they should check your vision and you should have to retake the written test. Why? because most people cannot drive safely and almost every single time I get out I almost get hit by a negligent drive. Whether I’m on my bike or walking

 

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Emotions, They REALLY Suck Sometimes

Right now I am struggling. I want to cry, but I cannot. I mean I am literally mentally incapable of letting myself cry (yes, I self diagnosed that.), I no longer know how to let myself cry, to let the pain out. So I am left feeling like I did as a kid, I want to pick something up and swing it around, maybe hit something, I don’t know. All I do know is that I want to cry, I want to move, I want to scream as loud as I can, at the people who hurt me. I moved in with some people from work, I put a lot of my own money into moving out, thinking they would repay me. oh yeah, I put my name on the one bill we had (shaw, cable internet and phone all through them). Well those were really the only mistakes I made. I tried my best not to argue, but things didn’t go smoothly, and we did argue, or rather myself and the other female roommate did. I won’t get into what we argued about, beyond her dogs, her lack rent, and me closing the blinds on her. Because of that, she felt there was too much tension and after a few more lies, kicked me out of my own house (I was on the rental agreement, she isn’t). I let it happen because, really things cannot get better after that. She turned even bitchier, lied some more, claiming I stole from them, that I was planning on stealing from them, etc. My trust was so violated. The day they evicted me I spent $200 on things for the household, even though I wasn’t going to be there for two weeks as I was house sitting . They knew I was going to do this. They didn’t refuse it, or anything. And the note they taped on my door, made it clear that they didn’t want to discuss it.

 

You know what, I really wish I could go back to being eight years old again. Really, no responsibility, not a care in the world, my biggest decision was… umm… I got it, whether or not I was going to behave, or act out, what toys to play with. that’s sooooooo much simpler.

 

Is Forgiveness The Only Option?

Is Forgiveness The Only Option?.

I’ve been saying for years that for myself I cannot forgive my abuse, but while my reasoning is different ( Social use of the word implies condoning the behavior. And my family expects me to keep one of my abuser in my life.), What I’ve been trying to do, let go of the pain is the same. Now I just have to figure out how to. (I think I know the first step but it’s gonna be hard… bye bye family, ’cause I can’t be around my mom and it would be expected of me.)